Humanity Suffers From Limiting Beliefs

For centuries now, human beings have perpetuated and disseminated certain limiting beliefs that result in limiting attitudes and behaviors. As a result, humanity has for centuries transmitted and preserved beliefs that only damage us as a species. Instead of uniting us and making us stronger, they weaken us. Only by identifying, questioning and changing those beliefs will humanity advance into a new and more accepting existence.

Let me give you an example. Most human beings consider theirs one of the best, if not THE best culture in the world. Many people believe things such as...

• Mine is the best culture in the world.
• My culture transmits values, principles and virtues like no other culture.
• Many of the traditions in my culture make us better than others

When new human beings are then born into one of those cultures, they learn to despise others, even though they originally had no choice at all where to be born. They will antagonize others, just based on those beliefs. And might even feel great insecurity or anxiety if anybody then proves them wrong.

That's the way in which conflict and crises are created. There are many of those limiting beliefs transmitted from generation to generation. Some examples are:

• My culture and inherited worldview hold THE truth
• Only those adhering to my culture are right
• Only WE are the chosen ones. All others are less than us
• We are whom we were born to be. By being born where we were born, we are superior to others because our culture offers us some principles, views or beliefs that make us better
• Success is humanity's ultimate goal
• Human beings need to be important. We need to strive and to always try and be better
• Life is a race we need to run
• Life is hard

When two people from different cultures but with the same belief meet, both are convinced that theirs is the superior one. By trying to prove the other one wrong, conflict arises. And because they firmly believe their opinion, they try to prove their views superior and try to convince the other person of their mistake.

By perpetuating certain beliefs, we also perpetuate limitations and conflict.

This doesn't need to be like this, though. Human beings have a choice. They can choose to modify the beliefs they transmit just a little bit so that they are not that limiting. Instead of: "Life is a race we need to run," the belief can be something like, "Life can be a race to run." Instead of: "My culture and inherited worldview hold THE truth," it could be, "my culture and inherited worldview hold my truth." Or even, instead of: "Life is hard." something like, "life can be hard or not". Just those changes in the wording open new possibilities. By not being so limiting, we give the next generation permission to question the rigidity of their beliefs and the choice to accept others more easily, thus helping humanity come to an understanding.

I know this approach will need some time, some generations, to become a reality. But no road is walked without taking a first step. I wish my little reflexion here today could help you take that tiny first step by making you at least think about this and about your own limiting beliefs from a slightly different perspective.

If you then discover that your own beliefs are limiting you, ask yourself how to change the way in which you express them every day when talking with others, with your children or any other children still growing, with others in society, with your peers and friends. Ask yourself how to contribute by planting the new seed of a less limiting belief that can grow into your culture. When somebody expresses a limiting cultural belief, offer a less rigid one instead so a little hope can be shared. We can all change those beliefs step by step, seed by seed, word by word. Help yourself and help generations to come do away with some of our obstacles, limitations and conflicts. Redefine your own beliefs.

I encourage you to consider and approach some more ideas:

• Replace limiting and sentencing words from your beliefs. Instead of saying, always, never, everyone, nobody, and so on, open your expression to wider terms such as, occasionally, seldom, most people, just some, and others.
• When speaking, be it with adults or children, add an extra layer of flexibility to your words. Leave a door open to doubt. After all, no human being knows it ALL; no human being has lived it ALL. Thus, begin expressing your beliefs by declaring that they are YOUR beliefs but there could be others as valid as yours.
• Ask yourself what is limiting you, what obstacles you face in life and check how you talk about them to yourself. There's very likely room for changes in the way you speak to yourself too.
• When thinking about the supremacy of your culture, remember that all other great cultures in history were finally replaced by newer ones. Question the historical basis of your belief. Question your beliefs from their roots.
• Give yourself permission to doubt. Allow doubt in others, too.
• Look for and define beliefs that trigger positive instead of negative feelings, thoughts and emotions in you.
• Give yourself permission to learn and continue growing.

Enjoy life, ALL of it,
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Change Beliefs That Limit You by "Reframing" Them

When you hold beliefs that aren't working for you, such as "I'm not good enough," "I can't," or "I don't deserve," you are probably in the trap of limiting beliefs. These self-limitations are one of the biggest obstacles to achieving success.

Sometimes it is difficult to change those beliefs because they operate subconsciously. When you want to change the beliefs, but are having trouble believing something different, a technique called "reframing" is a simple, yet powerful way to change. Have you ever wanted to frame a picture or photograph and noticed that the type of matting and frame you use brings out certain colors or characteristics in the picture? The same is true when you reframe events in your life or beliefs you hold.

When you reframe a belief, you change your perceptions of it. There are two different ways of reframing.

First, reframing can involve finding an alternate meaning for the behavior you are interpreting to support your belief. For example, if you believe that someone not saying "hello" to you means that you aren't good enough to be acknowledged, look for an alternate interpretation of that behavior. It might be that the person didn't see you, is preoccupied with a problem, or is blind as a bat without their glasses. It might also be that you look different. I've had this happen when I've lost weight or changed my hair. The question to ask is "What else could this behavior mean?"

Second, you can also look for a context in which you would respond differently to the same behavior. For example, if I was out with friends, I might be relieved not to have the pressure of having to introduce my friends to them (and remember everyone's name). Or I might be relieved they ignored me if I was in a hurry or didn't look my best.

One of the things that reframing does is to change the emotional charge associated with the belief. In the above example, the emotion changes from feeling rejected and hurt to relief. I might even be happy they didn't recognize me if I'd been working on a make-over. When you change the emotion associated with the limiting belief, it allows you to see it differently. That allows you to consider other possibilities. Then, instead of having a belief that limits you, you now have beliefs that increase your possibilities.

Reframing takes some practice, but is a way to change your emotional state and also change the beliefs that limit you from success. What would you like to believe instead? What are the alternative ways of perceiving your situation?

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